Positive Adoption Language as National Adoption Month Closes

With just a few days remaining in November (National Adoption Month), I wanted to post one last article concerning adoption. This article is taken from the website of Christian Works For Children in Dallas, Texas. For more information go to www.christian-works.orgPOSITIVE ADOPTION LANGUAGE
The way we talk – and the words we choose – say a lot about what we think and value. When we use positive adoption language, we say that adoption is a way to build a family just as birth is. Both are important, but one is not more important than the other.
Choose the following, positive adoption language instead of the negative talk that helps perpetuate the myth that adoption is second best. By using positive adoption language, you will reflect the true nature of adoption, free of innuendo.

Positive Adoption Language
Positive Negative
Birthparent………………………………………Real parent
Biological Parent…………………………………Natural parent
Birth child………………………………………Own child
My child…………………………………………Adopted child, own child
Born to unmarried parents………………………….Illegitimate
Terminate Parental Rights………………………….Give up
Make an adoption plan……………………………..Give Away
To parent………………………………………..To keep
Waiting child…………………………………….adoptable child, available child
Biological Father…………………………………Begetter
Making contact with……………………………….Reunion
Parent…………………………………………..Adoptive parent
International adoption…………………………….Foreign adoption
Adoption triad……………………………………Adoption triangle
Permission to sign a release……………………….Disclosure
Search…………………………………………..Track down parents
Child placed for adoption………………………….An unwanted child
Court termination…………………………………Child taken away
Child with special needs…………………………..Handicapped child
Child from abroad…………………………………Foreign child
Was adopted………………………………………Is adopted

Words not only convey facts, they also evoke feelings. When a TV movie talks about a “custody battle” between “real parents” and “other parents”, society gets the wrong impression that only birthparents are real parents and that adoptive parents aren’t real parents. Members of society may also wrongly conclude that all adoptions are “battles”.
Positive adoption language can stop the spread of misconceptions such as these. By using positive adoption language, we educate others about adoption. We choose emotionally “correct” words over emotionally-laden words. We speak and write in positive adoption language with the hopes of impacting others so that this language will someday become the norm.